We had big news today at work. My old department is being disbanded and the work moved to a new centre within the group. They've promised no redundancies, that staff will be integrated into other teams but its still a shock to a lot of my frinds and colleagues. The next couple of months are going to be difficult. I can see the benefits of what the company are doing. It will mean a more centralised process, with new systems and hopefully a faster turnaround time.

On the otherhand I can say bye bye to my regular source of overtime. That is going to HURT. They've cut down on it big time this year aleady, I mean last year I was earning on average £200-300 extra a month in peak times. That extra money was really making a difference and I'm going to have to learn to live without it. Bluch!

This morning I overslept, really overslept....like 2.5hrs overselpt! Normally my alarm goes off at 5.30 and I get up a 6. This morning I turned over looked at my alarm clock and it said 8.02am. Bugger is probably the politest thing I said seeing as Hayley was waiting outside to drive in to work. I was however ready by 8.21am, hungry but ready!

My current cross-stitch is coming along nicely. I'm onto my third cat! My bunnies are cranky but ok except for Smudge who has developed this interesting sneezing habit. He sees the vets on friday, just in time for payday. Woopee.

The weather is pretty pants. Just lots of ominous grey clouds. No rain, no drizzle just horrid grey clouds that drift over followed by more grey clouds and occassionally a glimpse of blue sky whic promptly vanished behind more grey clouds! Its very oppressive. I wish it wouold just thunder and get it over with.

Enough for now, my fish pie is ready.

So another stressful and demoralising week at home. Still worried about money, I'm not holding my breath that my sister will get maternity money seeing as her boss is a emotional, financial blackmailer taking advantage of her staffs ignorance. Unless a miracle happens I'm going to have to put my OU plans on hold until next year. The first course has to be paid and booked early august and this months salery just isn't going to stretch to that, nor likely is the next couple of paydays if I'm covering for Sarah as well.

On the other hand I have squeezed (painfully) £11.99 a month into my budget to pay for the Unlimited card for cineworld. I can now go and see any film any time without paying. Its brilliant. I thought about it carefully and at £11.99 a month thats £144 a year. Now films are currently £7.50 a pop (Unless you go on cheap tuesdays £4.50). That means I only need to see 20 films to break even. I've clocked up 3 so far this weekend! <:o) Prince Caspian, Hancock & Kung Fu Panda.

So many films are coming out that I want to see and this means that I can see them whenever is convenient to me and it can be a ray of light in an otherwise currently dull world. It gives me a chance to escape my worries for a couple of hours and catch up with friends without spending a fortune on a meal or drinks. I can also see them as many times as I like. I'll propabaly see Prince Caspian again cos you don't always absorb it completely the first time. Especially when a film is two hours or more.

With Kaye driving now we can also go to later showings without worring about how to get home. It nice to see a film without kids mucking about in the front/back rows. Also if the weather holds next weekend Kaye, Hayley and I are going to try a day trip to the beach. Seeing as we live slap bang in the middle of the country (seriously from where we live you couldn't possibly get further from the coast if you tried) its going to mean an early start, very early. It'll be good to get out and about just the three of us for a change. We're all so busy latley that we haven't had a chance for a good triple trouble day.

Got to have things to look forward too!

Bunny Moving Day...hmmm...wasn't that fun!
Mum is having a new disabled bath room being built for her by the council in a weeks time. We wanted it to go where our existing bathroom was but due to the awkwardness of living in a 110yr old house it was deemed unacceptable under currently building regs. So they are building it in the bunny room instead. Bunnies don't count for much when it comes to disabled facilities according to the local government, so my darlings are now all in the front of the living room. As they start work a week on monday I decided to move them this weekend to give them time to settle in before all the noise started.

Seeing as Alan is being unusually obstructive and offering to help didn't even occur to my sister or her partner I did it on my own with a little help for mum. I have scratches up my arms from connecting with doors and other immovable objects, a bruise on my knee and my foot where I dropped a hutch and a backache. But they are all in and it doesn't look as bad as I feared. 11 bunnies after all do take up a lot of space even just in their hutches. So far Sooty appears to be the only one upset by the move, but its early yet! We're keeping a close eye on Thumper as he had a bout of GI stasis on thursday night. He really worried us as he was refusing to take the recovery mix and thats a really bad sign from a bunny that loves to eat. Thankfully a trip to the vets, a couple of injections and some medicine has taken care of that. Didn't help my budget much though.

My budget. Theres an interesting joke! A budget implies a well planned financial situation. My budget is carefully planned right up to the moment my brother fails to pay his housekeeping again or Sarah pays late cos her boss decided she really need a £500 dress for a party. I'm trying to find £220 to take two short OU courses in the autumn. Some days it feels more like I'm trying to save £220,000. Right now things all round could be better.

Now I'm gloomy.

What happened that was nice this weekend? The weather? Nah! Its raining. My cross-stitch? Nope I only got about a dozen lines done.
Oh! The series finale of Doctor Who! OMG!!!! Brilliant. Utterly brilliant! My theory of what was going to happen was half right ( I figured Donna was actually a hidden Time Lord). But the ending? So heartbreaking, so horribly unfair for both Donna and the Doctor. So cruel! How can the writers be so MEAN? *sulks* It was utterly absorbing though. I made my usual cup of tea at the start and totally forgot to drink it! The programme finished and I suddenly saw this stone cold tea looking at me!

Oh and I did also just finish watching the mens wimbledon final. I'm not much of a tennis fan but odd wimbledon matches catch my interest. This match was enthralling. I decided to cheer for Nadal (as the percieved underdog) and got completely caught up in the last set. When he actually won, the shoe I had idly been swinging on my foot wentt flying and I only just caught it before it hit my face!

Ok maybe not quite so gloomy now.

I went kite flying on sunday. I very much needed the fresh air after the migraine on saturday. (So doped up on my medication I slept through our neighbours sanding their internal walls!) Kaye and I were up on the Dunstable Downs, with my mum who very knowingly sat there with our bags while went went off and acted like kids again. It was exhausting and very funny. Lots of running around and staring at the sky. Sunday was very blustery and it only added to the fun. Kaye had to chase after her errant  kite twice, me only once. My hill standing start to running is very pathetic a salient reminder that I really need to get jogging again.

Kites are very much a childhood thing. To me they symbolise that wonderful freedom that is childhood, the ability to stare at a colourful bit of paper dancing in the sky and forget all your earthbound troubles. More people need to pick up a kite now and then. Maybe the world wouldn't be so depressing if more people reminded themselves that fun can be had with a reel of string and a few bits of bright paper. Children certinaly have the right ideas, its just a shame that as we grow up we forget the simpler things in life.

A box is not just a box, it's a rocket or a racing car or a house.
A sheet is not just a sheet, it's a tent from which cowboys and indians appear or it's a dark cave from which dragons breath fire.
On overgrown patch of garden is not just a pile of weeds, it's a secret hide out, a lost world ANYTHING you can imagaine.

That ability to imagine, we lose as we get old. Things become set in stone, impossible, impractical, beyond our reach. A kite is just a few bits of colourful paper tied to string.....

A kite is a firebird waiting to take flight, its a magical colourful explosion dancing in the air, in the wind, in my mind. A kite is anything I can imagine and if I can imagine that what else can I imagine, what else is possible, what magic can I create?

It been raining. I know my garden likes the rain but I DON'T! At least not in the quantity we currently seem to be getting. Slugs and snails have had a field day on my vegi patch. A whole row of Lollo Rosso lettuces vanished in two day. A WHOLE ROW!!! *very angry* On the other hand my front window boxes are coming along nicely. The ruffelt petunia are flowery and they look stupendous. There are lots of shades of pink from electric to a soft blush and bizzarely one purple flower...go figure!

Sarah and Simon have been in for a week now and things are very strained on all parts. Its not easy and tempers are running high. Things aren't helped by the washing machine acting awkward again. (Hose at the back got dislodged)  This is all I'm saying on the matter regarding my sister cos otherwise this entry will turn into one long rant. Ditto about Alan....

Workwise I have moved teams (less than brillantly communicated to my old team) and at the end of the first week I find myself cautiously optimistic. I'm booked in for two days of intensive training on one process next week and I think I'm going to enjoy doing something new.

Bunnies have had their second jabs and the vets bill has destroyed my savings again. I don't mind paying I just wish it was all at once!
Pepsi is bitey again and they are all a little antsy what with the bad weather and the dogs moving in. BB (bless) sat on my lap watching Bones last night and decided that she was going to groom me. I don't mind being groomed its just her licking my arm is kinda ticklish and I keep giggling. (I'm sure she thinks I crazy). Sooty still has bum issues but I have managed to avoid his teeth (touch wood) and we are weening him back onto a special selective food that should help with the problem.

Bilbo still moults like crazy but we are now trying him with a few drops of pinapple juice (as recommende by a bunny savvy vet) and it does seem to be having an small but growing effect. With less fur flying his sneezing seems to be also calming down. Foxy as always is lapping up the adoration of anyone who comes in the house and all of mums carers are besotted with her! Charcoal now has a short run on his own before we let Blossom out otherwise he gets no exercise. Poor boy, Bloss pins him down and grooms him for hours and he hardly gets a chance to run!

Mopsy and Smudge have discvered than hurdling the tube is far more fun than running through it. Smudge defies his grand age of 7 to act like a young buck,  while I have yet to wean Mopsy off her habit of chewing metal. Grass mats, licks, toys nothing except burying her in hay. Except she eats her way out and continues her bid for freedom! Thumper has discovered how much fun it is to jump in and out of his hutch....and enourages his sister Flopsy to do the same! If I don't get the door shut fast enough I have to catch Flopsy and put her back in her own hutch.

A big bit on bunnies today. My bunnies make me smile. They are all utterly, utterly mad and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Sarah is acting like a bull in a bloody china shop! I know she want to move in but she is bulldozing anyone in her path. Mum is pulling her hair out, Alan is even more awkward than usual and I have a HEADACHE!

Sarah and Simon have been emptying Alan's room of junk but at the same time she is disregarding that fact that some of mums stuff is in the cupboards. She started by chucking everything into the garden. Mum then had to sit out there and rescue all the expensive DIY tools she had bought Alan, credit card statments, crosstitch books and even a pair of gold earrings! How much trouble would it have taken Sarah to double check what she intended to rubbish!

Everything out of the study (now Alan's room) was dumped on mums bed so she had to spend three days sleeping in her arm chair which is not the most comfortable thing for an arthritic diabetic. (Grrhhh) I then spend two hours last night clearing everything on the bed into piles to be sorted on the floor and Sarah chucks more stuff in there from the cupboards! (Agghhhh!)

Sarah seems to be forgetting that she moved out 3 years ago and that this is only temporary. She is also forgetting who owns the house and whole pays the bills! If she keeps this up there is going to be a major clash between her and mum or worse her and ME.

And I won't pull any home truths just cos she's pregnant.....

Ok I confess! I'm hiding just a little. My sister and her partner are moving in sometime in the next week and the house is in turmoil as Alan is moved upstairs so thy can paint and refloor the basement room before moving in. Add to this the mountains of laundry everywhere as the washing machine has been broken for 4 weeks. It was ok but noisy for 3 weeks while we were waitig for parts then died completly sunday before last. As it was fixed this morning I'm on a marathon washing session this evening. It will be wonderful to look in my cupboards and think 'what shall i wear today' rather the 'what have i got clean that I can match up today'

Anyhow back to hiding... I spent most of the weekend either at Kaye's or out with Kaye. I'm not being selfish I just can't face working all week and then coming home to the organised chaos that is my sister moving in. There are still looking for a place to rent, but finding something close enough to commute to the yard, under £500 that will take dogs is proving difficult. I'm hoping this is a temporary measure but knowing my sister I'm not holding my breath. The strain is starting to show with mum and Alan already ...

Other things...nicer things... all this rain means my garden is blooming! I have vegi shoots popping up everywhere and my clematis are starting to flower.  Annoyingly the rain also means all the weeds are also popping up. Hopefully this nice bank holiday weekend will be dry and sunny so i can get out and was war on the weeds.

My bunnies had the first of the yearly (and very expensive jabs).  A couple have been outed as being overweight and are back on the diet mix (grumpy bunnies). Our vet has concluded that my darling BB is the fluffyiest bunny she has ever meet. (She is convincedthat BB is all fur and no body, to be honest somedays I'm convinced she is too!). The bad weather has meant no runs outside and all the moving inside has limited their runs so I have 11 cabin fevered bunnies rattling at me when I get home from work. I'm making a big fuss of them and making sure everyone gets out for a cuddle each eveing. Hopefully this won't last much longer.

I also have a new bunny relate scar where our littlest dwarf Sooty decided he was fed up of having his bum cleaned and medicine stuck down his throat and managed to get my finger when I was moving too slow. Its quite a nice incisor cut and I'm sure if I had been a fraction slower he would have gone down to the bone. Soots is currently a very crankly little bunny.

Okay I now have more aching muscles, another bug bite and a new bruise on my big toe where I dropped a TV on my foot. (Don't ask).
My new strimmer is up and running. It really makes your hand ache but got the job done. I now have half my vegetable patch either planted or seeded and am restraining myself for doing the rest for at least another week or two. If I seed the whole thing now everything will fruit/mature at the same time which would definatly overload the freezer! I am now down to the most depressing and frustrating job in the garden....Weeding. Bluch!

Yesterday evening a spectaular thunderstorm passed by. We could hear it rumbling for a good hour before it went by to the south west of the town. I sure the neighbours now think I am nuts as I was watering the garden watching this storm rumble by! It was pretty amazing though. I had a really good view of the storm and the lightning was very impressive quite often there were two or more forks at one time. Glad it didn't hit us.

Today it's overcast and I'm going to give myself a break from the garden. My room is a mess and I have a huge pile of grass/mud stained washing. Also one pair of beetroot stained trousers where the lid wasn't on the jar properly and I managed to get beetroot juice all over me, the fridge, the kitchen floor, the side....

Hoping Sarah can come over this weekend and take some more junk to the tip. I would dearly love to get into my other green bin as I have lots of garden waste to go. Sarah and Simon should be coming over soon to help shift Alan back into the upstairs bedroom as they are moving into the basement bedroom temporarily. Sarah being pregnant, and with the two dogs they will need the space and the access to the garden. Part of me is very angry cos I could see this coming the day she annouced she was expecting and I am not looking forward to being in a house with 5 adults. Especially as I am the only one in fulltime employment (and I'm very tired of paying for other people). It'll be nice having more people to share the chores and hopefully the move will wake Alan up from his current sulk and jerk him into getting a job. He won't be able to stay up till unhealthy hours of the morning as his room will be next to mine and if he interupts my sleep there will be consequences in the form of a hammer going through his computer!

Anything else?? I have to go back to work in two days... (Rats!) Oh! Dom and Jess! Very cute. There is a new cat in the neighbourhood and Dom has gone very territorial. Alan and I found him puffed up facing down the cat in number 10's garden. I ended up tossing water at the pair of them. Dom shot in the house fur all fluffy, stalked around for about 10min until he was sure this other cat wasn't in the house!
Jess has discovered the garden properly and is spending more time out there. She especially likes lying in the wild garden. However the tits nesting in the box there do not like her there and I keep having to shoo her out! Currently I can see out my window that Jess is sitting on the top step and Dom is hiding a metre away behind some plant pots. They are having a staring contest. <:o)

So here I am tuesday of my week off work. I have one nasty bug bite, two blisters and far too many aching muscles to count anymore! My garden is starting to look tidy again. I blitzed the patio with Kaye's help yesterday and spent most of todat digging the vegi patch, moving the raspberry cane & strawberries. I think its the wrong time of year to move the fruit but next doors new shed has cut off a lot of light to the old patch and they were not doing well.

I have a new toy for my garden... a cordless strimmer so I can now cut the grass up by the shed & greenhouse without using a pair of shears and being bit to death by the red ants. Sadly I need a very small screwdriver to put two silly little screws in before I can take it for a spin. Sarah's partner Simon has one that he'll bring over next time. So untill then I shall just have to wrestle with the lawnmower.

My new mattress has arrived and is muy, muy comfortable.

I'll update more later in the week cos my dinner is ready and for a change I haven't cooked it!

So yes jogging for three minutes and then 4 minutes did hurt...but it felt good afterwards. Then an old whiplash injury in my neck and shoulders decided it would be a good time to play up. Normally I take painkillers for a few days and it calms down. Not this time. After two weeks of daily doeses of nurofen I caved in and went to see on of my GP's. He gave me a nice muscle relaxant... which also acts as a sleeping tablet.

My neck is starting to feel better but boy oh boy have I been sleeping! Its better if I take it on a full stomach but there have been a few days where I have been a zombie in the morning at work! Sadly this meant I did no jogging at all last week. Tomorrow is going to make a me hurt.

Any other news???

I had to fork out a fourtune for a new mattress after my old one popped a spring while I was changing the sheets. A pair of my jeans now have a nice inch long gash in the leg. Not impressed!

I was naughty and bought some new tops today but was good as they were for work. I'm trying to get out of the habit of wearing black or dark blue at work. Yes i know I look good in dark colours but I roast in the sun.

I finally got out in the garden yesterday and started digging over my vegetable patch. I have next week off work so I'll do a big blitz on it all then. It was nice to get out in the sun and enjoy myself. I was followed up and down the garden by one of the male blackbirds which are nesting in our garden this year. Everytime I turned the fork there he was looking for a worm. Sadly I haven't seen my robin who has shawdowed me gardening for the last couple of years. I turned my compost and was gleefully happy at what I found. Mostly its coming along nicely. One box was really warm deep down and I'm hoping that I might have some in a month or so to go around the vegetable.

The clouds are pretty spectacular today. I have a nice view at work and at home and they have been really dramatic today. I like cloud watching (especially when you spend 7hrs a day staring at a computer screen) sometimes you can drift away for a moment. I'm half expecting some thunderstorms this week looking at the clouds.

Ok I am offically announcing that I am in training to run/jog ...maybe walk... the race for life at Campbell Park in MK this june. (And here everyone thought I was jogging cos I was trying to hurt myself!) Hayley and I are following the recommended training schedule that slowly (very slowly) builds up your stamina.

When we started jogging 6 weeks ago it hurt, I mean it REALLY BLOODY hurt...now it just aches. Today we jogged for a whole three minutes ( 5 times with 2 min walking in between) but still 3 minutes non-stop. And it feels good. When we were just jogging for 1min it hurt a lot. Then we progressed to 1.5min and then 2 whole min and slowly you start to feel a rhythm. Today 3 min felt like a long time but under that was the thought that ....maybe I can carry on a bit longer....even after Hayley (with the timer) yells 'Stop'.  Next week we get to jog for a whole 4 and then 5 min. Bet I won't be saying how good it feels then!

My birthday has passed this week and I am yet another year older. Don't feel it. I got some nice cards and a couple of cheques from the family. Hayley decided to embaress me at work by sneaking up while I was grabbing a cup of tea next door (she ordered me to go) and plonking a balloon and a load of confetti on my desk. I made the mistake of saying that my birthday was just another day to me unless it was one of those 'landmark' birthdays. Hayley I think was terribly offended that I was not excited about my birthday, hence all the decorating.

Despite being in work I did go home with a smile, maybe (yes Hayley you can crow) a little excited it was my birthday.

Oh and I got two more Terry Pratchett Discworld books for my birthday to feed my addiction...sorry...collection.

I am a total Terry Pratchett fan.. I love the discworld series, it is just some barmy and yet true to life (in a bizarre turn it on its head kindof way). I am re-reading my discworld collection at the moment mostly out of order and dependng on my mood. Also I'm missing several of the earlier books. Hayley has this 50 book challenge going again this year and I feel perhaps I ought to do something like that. Then I remember that I get through anywhere between 2- 5 books a week (more if I'm feeling low). Once back in my teens when i was REALLY depressed I clocked up 46 books start to finish in 1 WEEK!!!! I completely read out my high school library and most of the local public library.

Sci Fi and Fantasy is my choice of read though I do dabble in some crime and the odd autobiography. Occasionally catch myself reading a non-fiction book but thats rare. I did go through this whole late teens early twenties romance bend. Lasted about 5 years. Couldn't get enough of Mills & Boon. I finally cleared out the rest of that collection earlier this year, though I do keep a few favorite for down days or long chill out baths. They are what I call 'eyeball garbage' reads.

My problem is reading new books. I like re-reading old ones. Its like catching up with old friends. You read things you know, remember bits you''ve forgotton or even discover bits you didn't really notice before.  Maybe I ought to try and read 50 completely new books???

Its book reading weather to be honest. It was nice for a couple of days and I got some planting on done but now its all grey and cold again. Blugh!

Woohoo!!! I'm back online.  Much better, much faster and half the price....I like it!

I'm jogging again and enjoying it. Hayley says I'm obviously not pushing myself cos I'm not falling apart each time. It is taking me less time to cautch my breath again and it doesn't hurt so much now.

There you Up and Running!

 Neurotic?? Easy..my appearance. I'm the sort of person who doesn't even pop out for a paper with checking my hair or my face (Having had cronic acne now for 14yrs and counting the face thing is understandable). Bizzarely it did bother me much while I was away. In fact I went a whole month without wearing make-up just the odd bit of concealer. 

It even drives me crazy when I see other people dressed all slapdash. How hard is it to iron a pair of trousers or a shirt? If you're going to work why wear a silly strappy top. Aagghh!!!!

I know exactly where my neuroticisms come from. And so do all the evil girls from middle school who thought it was fun to pick every aspect of my appearence for 4 years. 

So this stupid cold that is going around that lingers and lingers means my ears hurt and my sinuses ache. Add to that a toxic air conditioned office that breeds germs and you can imagine I'm not feeling my best.

My legs also ache from jogging today. I was unwell thursday week before last so didn't jog. Then I did saturday overtime and the weather went all nasty and somehow jogging kindof went out the window for a week. I'm paying for that now...

To add a third to the mix (cos things like this ALWAYS come in threes) my whiplash in my neck is also playing up. No matter how I sit I cannot get comfortable. Seriously the most comfortable position at the moment is propped up with lots of pillows and with my feet on a stool. Not ideal for work.

So I'm moaning...I don't care!

Plus side of things. I nearly have my new broadband and I'm half way through cross-stitch number three. Admitedly i did spend part of my easter weekend un-picking several rows cos I was 1 stitch out but I'm getting there.

Little steps...thats the key. If I think of everything I have to do in one go I panic and hide in my bed with a good book and put it all off until tomorrow, which of course never comes. If I think if I finish this today or tidy this bit today then perhaps I can do this tomorrow...

I'm still here, just very busy. 

1) Lots of gardening to do...STOP BLOODY RAINING!!!!!!!
2) Trying to blitz my cross-stitch 'to do' drawers. 2 down roughly 60 more to go (No exaggeration!)
3) Searching for better deals on broadband and random stuff. Aiming to save more money!
4) Still de-junking my life. My room is emptier but I am still tempted on a daily basis with more junk...
5) Trying very hard not to procrastinate but its difficult. Its very easy to say i'll do that later or I'll just finish watching this then I'll do that. Thats why I wound up watching Lewis last night when I should have been putting away my washing and ironing my work clothes...BAD GIRL!

Bunnies are more or less ok. Bilbo is back on medication for his sneezing though. Trying to wrestle a syringe full of medicine into a 2.6kg fighting english lop is not a fun way to spend my mornings! Cats have conned me into feeding them in the morning twice...and then been fed again by mum. Bad kitties! Jess has discovered she likes sleeping on my computer chair and Dom lurks outside my room blending efficently into the dark blue carpet in the dawn light so I tread on him and he mauls my foot.

Busy busy! 

So I had a seriously lazy weekend. A long weekend as I also had friday off.
Lets see I popped in to town, did a few chores, watched 7 DVD, did a lot of Xstitch and drank far to many cups of tea. Oh and I also admit to two cadbury's small choc trifles, half a packet of cadbury's choc digestive and about a quarter of a tub of mint choc chip ice cream.

Yep a nice lazy weekend!

I was catching up on some old books and made a horrible discovery I had book 1 of a series and book 3 but not book 2! How on earth did I manage that? So talking to Kaye she says give me the name and I'll get it for you for your birthday. Turns out it's out of print and apparently hard to come by. Which is why the cheapest second hand version Kaye coud find was £50 on amazon. *jaw drop* I googled the name and found one for £36 but still....

So if anyone put there has a copy of 'The Wolf Within' by Pamela Belle leave me a message!

Ok I have to laugh about this. The UK had a 5.3 earthquake this morning. I slept right throught it, though there was a half remembered stray though of 'I wonder if all my ornaments will be ok after the quake' as Dom crawled into my bed by my shoulders. Unsual for him cos he likes to sleep on my feet!  I overslept and rushed through my shower and breakfast with even switching on the TV to watch the morning news. Wondering why the bunnies were so quiet I shot off to catch a train.

Its only upon being greeted at work with 'Did you feel that earthquake last night?' that I found out. Mind you once you have heard that question asked by everyone coming into the office (and our office is big) and the statement 'But the UK never has quakes' I got a little fed up. In then end I started answering questions with...

'So what? Its my third big quake this year.' Its amazing how fast that blase comment shut people up. Hayley told me 'Oh aren't you being cool you humbug' by text.

Seriously though its like when it snows, the whole country is amazed and grinds to a halt. It is the sole topic of conversation. I mean come on! Half the world shakes, rattles and rolls each year... what on earth make them think the UK is immune? There are old fault lines, new stresses as the plates grind again each other. I mean one half of the UK is rising whilst the other half is sinking cos of tectonic movements. In NZ or the USA a 5.3 would barely make the papers or the evening news.

So I reiterate my title for today... A UK earthquake? Big Deal!

I will however admit that it is the biggest earthquake I was in this year..

Its weird how much changes in one month. Or rather how my perspective changes when I am taken away from the 'norm' and then come back. People seem different, some seem more open and others are closed.

Maybe its me. I see people differently.

Maybe its how people reacted to me changing or dissappearing for a month. 

I know I want more from life now. I want to meet someone. To have someone take care of me for a change. But that requires courage. Cos I am not the most social person in the world. Part of that is nature some of that is nuture. My parents marriage was not the best, yet I seem some of my friends in relationships and think I want that for a change.
Then I remember the bullying at school that warped my thinking and turned me from an outgoing person into a shy person.

I was once the ring leader at school, the popular one. Then all of a sudden seperated from my usual friends I became the odd one. And the more isolated I grew the further away my friends or possibility of new friends seemed.

As I once wrote in a poem 'To a bully' 

'I am but a footnote in your life
You are a chapter in mine'

Ok, this is kind of deep now. 
Sometimes though you just need to get the words out to start the ripples in the pond.