Bit of a mixed day today. I woke up yesterday with a sore left wrist completly oblivious to how I've done it. I'm right handed, I haven't done any gardening or heavy lifting so its a bit of a mystery. I saw the doc today and he says so long as it isn't swollen keep taking the iboprofen and wearing the support bandage and it should settle down again. I wonder if I slept on it funny?...

The there was work which was going ok until a query I had since last week escalated out of my control as it needed higher sign off. Suddenly one of the most mild mannered (senior) managers in the building came down a tore a strip off me over it! it was so sudden and out of the blue that it threw me completly and left me stuttering as he walked off with the paperwork. It left me stunned and even my manager asked what I had done. He came back twenty minutes later having sorted it and apologised nicely but it left me feeling really annoyed. Just because he was having a stressful day and people were making demands on him was no reason to snap at me. I had done my job and when the person with the query asked who my senior manager was of course I gave out the name. How am I supposed to know hes so busy, high and mighty that he dosn't want his name given out?!  Ohh! My blood is still boiling.

*Calming breath*

I don't think the weather isn't helping either. Everyone is hot, bothered and annoyed at having to be at work when they could be enjoying the summer. My room is already developing oven like atributes again and its going to be another muggy night.

*Bluch, depressing*

On to more amusing things, like my poor cat Dom who had to have a dental today. It took 12 minutes to wrestle him into the carrier this morning before I went to work and he yowled the whole time waiting for the lift to the vets. Have you ever heard a cat who doesn't want to go to the vets? Its pitiful!

'Maaiiiooowwwww, Miaow, Miaaooowwwwwwww'

Along with the paw trying to escape through the carrier door. Extemely pitiful! Anyhow he is home tonight and doped upto the eyeballs. He's walking gingerly through the house with half closed eyes wonder why his mouth is numb and what the hell happened! He sat on my lap for a cuddle and he had absolutly no idea where he was, utterly spaced. It so funny! I l know its mean to laugh and he is being spoilt rotton but lord! its funny to watch him!

Bob! (Bob was our dog) shortly followed by Bob SIT! Bob DOWN! Bob BASKET!
Could honestly say Bob was a big influence on me talking!

God what a week at work that was. Just a bit of a nightmare with work piling up, staff on holiday, staff ill, staff who can't or won't work properly. Bloody frustrating! One collegaue is a lovely lady but I wish she would grow a bloody backbone and have confidence in her training. She asks the same question to two or even three people before she will accept the answer..aghh! On top of that we have a new pilot project taking place which is causing a major headache for anyone who touches the work. Wrong forms, not signed, illegible...the list of problems are endless. I was so drained when I got home from work yesterday that I spent 2 hours in a radox 'stress relief' bubble bath.

Today I have an essay to finish, finances to juggle, a greenhouse to water, shopping to get and if I have time wander down to the leisure centre and speak to the Harpers 'Salesperson' That leads nicely to my other gripe this week. I have to loose a bit of weight and get back in shape so i looked about at sports centre membership. Not necessarily a gym because my joints wouldn't appreciate that but a good deal on regular swimming, aqua-aerobics and pilates/yoga. I find lots of 'talk' but nothing useful. Nowhere can I actually walk in and pick up a leaflet on different progammes/packages, prices, general info that I can browse before I make a decision to look into it further or make enquiries just a lot of hard sell. Useless and extreamely off putting.

I'm also on the browse for Fairy wings for my costume to Hayleys parents 'F' Farewell partty. (Everyone comes dressed as an 'F' something) I don't want silly furry wings or the sort you pick up at claires for kids or hen parties. I want a really nice pair that I can keep and use again, something unusual. I looked online.....my keyboard is floating on drool! So many pretty wings, some quite reasonably priced as well. Shame I'm maxed out from the remaining vets bills this month and my budget is smaller than I would have liked (try microscopic!).

I need to get into Mum's wardrobes to get my 'posh' skirts out and match one up to a top for my costume. Then I have the dilemma of a friend's sister wedding whereby I need another posh outfit but can't really wear the same as the party cos people will be at both! I don't have that much posh clothes! I can't wear my chinese dress to either as it is a) to posh for the party b) black therefore not suitable for a wedding.
*Sigh* I will have to see what I can do!

Ok can't stay on long as there is a fantastic thunderstorm building up over the town at the moment. Caught a glimpse of it on the way home, plus the pressure has given me a headache all day and a nosebleed so its looking promising! I like thunderstorms. The noise, the light, the lashing rain the sheer power of it. I loved the thunderstorms we had while I was in India....anyhow I digress!

Its been a busy week since I last posted. I went to london to see my consultant, got caught in the tube strike (grr) and a signal failure on the mainline (double grr) not to mention a bus system that couldn't cope (agghh!) I spent 7 hours traveling for 30 min in the hospital INCLUDING all my tests! The upshot is they are not changing my medication because it is benefiting my heart too much but they are going to keep a closer eye on me. Woopee!

There was Hayleys birthday dinner on thursday at Wagamama's which was YUM! and the BBQ she had on saturday where her mum made the most humungous trifle I have ever seen. It was amazing! (I ate too much)

Anyhow this will have to be it as there are big black clouds overhead and rumbles in the distance.

The Twelve Dancing Princesses

I loved the idea that you could sneak out of bed and climb down into and amazing new world in your best dress, pretty shoes and dance the night away. I like secret worlds.

I'm nearly back to normal although I think I lost brain cells I was so ill. I keep forgetting important things like... my pin number and try to say something and suddenly start rambling off on a completly different subject muddling my words. More sadly I lost one of my bunnies Bilbo Baggins. (hence last fridays depressed rant at the world) he had been unwekll with a virus at the beginning of the year and it suddenly came back even worse than previously. There was no other humane choice really but it still hurt to make that decision. *sigh* Another of my bunnies Pepsi (pictured!) is also a little under the weather. Neither the vets or I can pin it down whats wrong, she just doesn't want to drink her water. Another mystery.

I did go back to work on monday although it left me exhausted. Work is funzizes at the moment as they are re-structuring the senior managers... again.  My OU course offical started on monday and I recieved a call from my new tutor to arrange our first discussion (tomorrow). I had planned to go through the pack and get everything in order last week but that didin't happen and I'm busy with work this week so it will have to be the weekend. Rats!

Theres not much else to tell right now so I'll leave it at that.

I hate being ill.
I hate wasting my vacation time because I am ill.
I hate that I have done nothing I planned this week.
I hate that my garden is a mess because I am ill and I have done nothing.
I hate that I havn't been able to make the birthday gift i wanted to for a friend because I am ill.
I hate that I worry about my job and money and the economy and the rescession and a million and one other things that keep me awake at night.
I REALLY HATE that today I had to have one of my bunnies put to sleep.

I HATE THIS YEAR

Everything!

Following a text message for a dear friend (you know who you are!) I am announcing that yes I am still alive despite being incommunicado for a week. For those of you who are interested I have been sick with a nasty headcold that attacked my sinuses. I spent most of my time in yorkshire feeling sick, remember very little of the bank holiday weekend and really am not sure if I'm going to be well enough to go back to work next week. I have spent the last 5 days lying on either my bed, the sofa or a chair in the garden (depending on the weather).
I am ridiculously dizzy and nauseated (although I've managed to avoid being sick) my head feels like its inside a drum and I have done nothing USEFUL. I can't read (the words all blur), I can't watch TV (it makes me feel sick), I can't cross-stitch, I can't garden, I can barely pick up a bunny without falling over, I can't even go for a walk without getting dizzy.

Things seem to be getting a bit better today (hence I can look at a computer screen without going cross-eyed) but if I wake up still dizzy I have to go to the doctors tomorrow. Personally I think my GP will say 'Yes...its a head cold just wait it out' but Mum and her friend Janet are insisting I should go to the doctors. *rolls eyes*

In summery, not the best fortnight off work.

Woohoo! I'm off work for a whole fortnight! Yippee *cartwheels down the wet garden*

Tomorrow I'm off to York with Kaye for a busy week exploring gardens and hiking over moorlands. Can't wait...

Can't post much.... I'm currently packing!

Hide from it! Dear lord I get enough attention as it is without encouraging more, especially at work.

An hour ago...a huge plate of chicken caesar salad.
Very full right now...

So I now know why I have been so tired the last few months, all the headaches, the lethargy and occasional dizzy spells....
I went to see my GP yesterday morning for my usual repeat prescription and a new supply of Hayfever tablets and she (as they always do) takes my blood pressure. Then asks if I mind if she takes my pulse again....next thing I know I'm booked in for an urgent ECG. A couple of hours later she is referring me back to my consultant in London for an urgent appointment. My blood pressure is low, my pulse rate is VERY low. 44 when she took my initial readings and 42 when they did the ECG (60-70 is the norm). She's 90% sure my medication needs adjusting down again but I have to see my consultant to rule out anything else first.

When I think about it I wonder why I didn't realise sooner. I figure I thought its was all because I was overworked and underpaid and very stressed. Well stress might be a contributing factor. So yippee another trip to london to be poked, prodded and wired up to various machines.

BAH! At least now its only a 4 day week thanks to being off ysterday. Plus it being a bank holiday weekend and my impending trip to london next week will be a 3day week! Even better I then only have 1 more week after that before I have my main fortnight off and my trip to York. So technically I only have 11 working days till I'm on holiday again. That sounds brilliant!

My garden is looking good, my vegitable patch is ready for planting. Sadly I need to replace my strawberry plants as my current patch has reached the end of its life and was uprooted on sunday. Woodier strawberry plants I've never seen. And my raspberries bushes have vanished completly. *Rolls eyes* I think I'll replace them in the autumn when I get new plum trees and re-establish my fruit patch once the shed is replaced and the compost bins moved. What else? The tulip are not as good this year which is disappointing. The Iris's are starting to flower for the first time. Nearly all my clematis are in bloom. I'm waiting to see the first green shoots from all the seeds I planted last week

Not much else for now, I need to go fetch a reluctant cat in!

Ok I'm in a slightly better mood now. I'm not going to update much cos I need to nip out and turn the compost before the light goes. I have new bedding plants in and my clematis are flowering madly in the greenhouse. I'm not overly happy but I'm going to get back there.

Mum and Alan are having a blazing row.

Work is stressful what with all the extra scrutiny and disciplinaries that are being handed out.

And one of my colleagues who I have known most of my life and really like got dismissed on thursday.

Good mood......GONE

Day 8: Spent an hour in Room No9 with a scone and TWO pots of tea. Devoured the Saturday Times and cursed the crossword. The weather was naff again so no gardening. I did however complete point 5 & 11 off my list! My bedroom is tidy once more and I can actually close my cloths cupboard now I 've sort out my clothes. There is a rather large bag going to the charity shops. Its brutal but I have to be strict. If I haven't worn and item of clothing in 6/12 months (excluding special eveningwear) it goes! Can't be sentimental about it all.

Day 9: Cleaned out the bunnies & de-fluffed them. The birds in our area are all going to have fur lined nests with what I'm putting out! Went to the cinema with Kaye and saw Race to Witch Mountain. Not quite as good as I was expecting but still ok.

Day 10: Today. The sun is (sort of) out and I've finally actioned point 2e. The pation is now clean and decluttered. I've done my 'homework' from work (I know last minute and all) and will be doing a bit more cross-stitch later. Right now Sarah and co are around for Easter dinner and I need to move the garden table onto the patio.

I can't believe the last 10 days have gone so fast. I've done most of what I planned to do, I'm just not sure if I'm ready to jump back on the treadmill at work. I'm pleasently relaxed and happy right now. *Sigh* nevermind only 5 weeks until my next holiday leave!

Been a bit lazy here, i keep forgetting to log on during the day and then cursing at night when I can log on cos my light is still broken. Doh!
Anyhow catch up ....

Day 5 very productive! I caught up with an old friend for a long chat over a pot of tea and then came home and finished Alan's bedroom. It is now a nice shade of blue and very tidy. I'm not holding my breath on how long the the tidyness will last but we'll see. Task 1 Done!

Day 6 was an exceedingly nice day. I caught up with more friends and was spoilt by friends and family alike. I even got to the garden centre and bought bedding plants. Task 3 done! One scary thing about thursday though...I went into Hobbycraft and came out with ONLY what I went in for. All the girls agree there is something very wrong there, it is scientifically impossible to go into a craft shop and not come oiut with more than you intended. Kaye and I were planning on going to the cinema but the film we wanted to see was only showing in 3D not normal 2D. 3D is a pain in the butt if you wear glasses especially if you have prism lenses like me.

Day 7 sod all done! To be absolutly honest I slept for most of the day.

Right I still have stacks to do and only three days left to do it. Next stop is the OU!

2d is done - my lawn looks nice and neat again. I even weeded the flower beds except now I can see all the gaps that the weeds filled!
I think point 3 is immienent.
Done a bit of 10 until the wind threatened to turn my pattern into a kite!

Still hurting a bit but nows its more of a dull ache.

I've preped Alans room and will be painting it this afternoon after I've been out to meet up with a friend. Unfortunatly Alan moved the last of Mums stuff out of his room into the study/dining room without asking where Mum wanted it all and the room is a mess. Thats put Mum into a foul mood which makes me glad I'm going out this morning.

I caught Dom jumping up on top of Thumpers hutch to look out of the front window. Unfortunatly Foxy's open top hucth is on top of Thumper and when this ruddy great cat jumped up I don't think she quite knew what to do! I chased Dom down and will have to move things so he can't do that again. The buns have been out in the garden this week (cleverly avoiding the rainstorms) and spring madness has infected all of them. Never have is seen such pixilated bunnies or so many binkies! It rained last night so the lawn is soggy but hopefully should be dry enough to get a couple out for a few hours this afternoon.

Right I have a train to catch!

I gardened all day.
Task 2a is half done
Task 2b is done.

I HURT!!!!!!!!!!!